If you feel insecure about a certain part of your body, obsess over it, and see it as a permanent defect, you may be suffering from body dysmorphic disorder – maybe you even have an official diagnosis. Chances are you’ve done many things to fix this “flaw” – from hiding it to attempting surgery.
Depending on the severity of your condition, body dysmorphia can significantly impede your life and negatively, dominate your daily routine, give you anxiety, and affect your romantic relationships.
Fortunately, there are ways that can help you accept yourself, deal with your body image, and become more confident in the bedroom. Here’s everything you need to know:
Get to Know Your Body First
Let’s start from the smallest, and yet most significant steps. Since your self-image is disrupted by your condition, try to overcome your fear by getting to know yourself better. First, you could try getting used to the sight of your body by standing naked in front of a mirror. Later on, find out what gives you pleasure, but don’t invite your partner just yet.
The best way to do that is through masturbation. Experts from The Adult Toy Shop recommend using your hands and adult toys. You can do it with or without porn, depending on your preferences. If you’re still uncomfortable with showing your body but want to get used to someone’s presence, a sex doll could be a good way to overcome this fear.
Talk With Your Partner
When you’re dealing with body dysmorphic disorder, chances are your partner will notice it too. There’s something holding you back in the bedroom and your life. If you’re close, they will see your struggle. However, they won’t be able to help if you don’t let them know what’s going on in your head.
In this case, honesty is key. You need to talk with your partner and tell them what kind of issues you’re dealing with. Tell them about your insecurities, and make sure they know if there’s anything they say that makes you uncomfortable.
An empathetic and understanding partner will avoid using words that can trigger you. Being open and honest is, in your situation, the best way to overcome your fears, regain confidence, and feel amazing in your bedroom again.
Unlearn Unhealthy Standards
A psychological condition like body dysmorphia doesn’t necessarily have to develop as a result of a real flaw. Unrealistic beauty standards and heavily edited posts on social media contribute to this problem to a great extent.
The same thing applies to adult movies if you and your partner like to watch them for inspiration. What you see on the screen rarely relates to what actually happens, but if you get a certain image ingrained in your mind, it’s difficult to convince yourself otherwise.
However, we encourage you to evaluate who you and your partner watch and follow on social media. Instead of typical Instagram models and actors or actresses, fill your feed with people who advocate body positivity.
This way, you’ll avoid seeing body types you probably won’t be able to achieve. If “unrealistic” is your normal, consider changing this mindset. It won’t be easy, but we guarantee that in time, you’ll notice a difference.
Go to a Therapist
Ultimately, if all other methods fail and you still can’t overcome your body dysmorphia, consider going to therapy. A psychologist or, in more severe cases, a psychiatrist could be your best bet to overcome your insecurities.
You can look for experts specializing in body dysmorphic disorder. This way, you’ll start working on your issues with someone who has experience in dealing with people with the same problem as yours.
If you want, you can invite your partner to accompany you on your way to recovery. You can try going to couples counseling sessions and talk about your disorder. Seeing a therapist is a great way to overcome your issues because you get an outside perspective on a problem that may be too difficult to deal with in your mind. Voicing your fears and sharing them in a safe environment can work wonders for you.
The Bottom Line
Body dysmorphia is not the easiest of conditions to overcome. The negative thoughts might be so ingrained in your mind that your “flaws” are all you can see. It doesn’t matter if you develop it as a result of unrealistic beauty standards we’re bombarded within the media, or a part of your body really stands out from the “norm.” If a certain area of your body takes away your confidence and joy, it’s time to take action.
Body dysmorphic disorder often has a negative impact on your life with a romantic partner. However, there are ways that can help you deal with it better. Self-discovery, honest conversations, taking it slow, and filtering your visual content can put you on the right path. If your condition is severe, consider seeing a therapist and try couples counseling. You can get better with the help of others.