You must have heard people saying it’s hard to let go of someone. Well, that’s right, letting go of someone is the hardest thing to do in a relationship. No matter what you do it’s always painful to let go someone you love. Whether it’s through separation or death, it doesn’t happen easily. So if you are looking for “how to let go of someone you love” then here are some tips to make the process easier and more manageable.
What does letting go of someone mean?
Letting go is much like grief. For most its a confusing and intense process. With each passing day, you will feel like you don’t know where it’s moving and every day feels different. One day you might think this is the right time and right thing to do but with passing day, the self-doubt can haunt you.
It’s not an easy process to let go of someone and may take several tries before actually doing it. People often choose two ways in these situations,
- Some never prefer this by anticipating the pain is unbearable.
- Others stay in abusive relationships as its less painful than being alone.
Remember, letting go often triggers a fear of abandonment, so clear your mind before making any decisions, after all its an individual choice. So if you are sure to let go then here are some ways to guide you in how to let go of someone you love.
Effective Ways To Let Go Of Someone You Love
1. Start with emotional separation
Emotion separation is the first thing you should do. For this do some mental exercise and meditation. Remember its a process and requires a certain amount of time. Here are some steps you should follow for emotional separation,
- Try to focus out of the person
- Get engaged with friends and family members
- Do less talk to start the detachment process
Follow these above steps and with time you will have control over your emotions.
2. Feel and admit the grief
Grief is the hardest part of ending a relationship. In fact, the pain associated with the let go may often bring up other losses. In order to let go of someone you love you have to feel and admit the grief.
Here are five stages of grief that you must feel and admit.
- Denial – Unable to understand the loss
- Bargaining – Attempting to fix or change the result
- Anger – Feel and intensity of why the relationship didn’t last
- Sadness – feeling the loss and regret
- Acceptance – feeling each stage and accept it
3. Start writing your story
Most don’t aware of the fact journal writing promotes healing. Writing not only helps you release your frustration but also provides a way to express your private feelings without bothering about feeling judged. This also helps you get to the root of your problem. With writing, you will get to deeper levels and this helps you make a link to the events that need healing.
4. Stop assuming their thoughts
One of the most common relationship mistakes that most people do is the attempt of mind reading. Almost 90% of the time mind reading goes wrong and creates a victim story in your mind. This initiates anger at first but then turns into a nightmare.
If you grew up being criticized and your partner gets mad at you, you might be afraid that they won’t love you and this creates conflict. Never the less its time to get lose of all your thoughts to let them go and live their life.
5. Focus on yourself
Focus on yourself and let go of the thing that tries to manipulate the outcome. Remember, focusing on others in these situations may trigger the vicious cycle of keep trying. You can’t control what’s outside of you no matter how hard you try.
I know its painful when someone wants to leave, there may be some reasons behind it you don’t know, but if you make up your mind to let the person go then shift focus on to you.
6. Lower your expectations and the process help you with healing
Letting go is a process that consumes your energy both physically and mentally. You may feel a mild depression but don’t worry as its common in this scenario. Lower your expectations and give some time to your grief and engage in extra activities to promote healing.
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This process is painful and let go of someone you love is a mix of intense emotions of grief, self-doubt, and fear. The one and only possible solution are through the pain and suffering. So never try to hold your emotions and release them. For example, if you are feeling the pain and want to cry then cry out. This will not only help you release your pain but also help you get rid of stress.